29 Weeks!

This week's blog is a little late.  I'm sorry.  I know, I know, it's not like me.  Allow me to explain.

Last night, I returned from a wonderful weekend away with one of my oldest, dearest friends.  It was likely my last "girls weekend" getaway before I become a mother.  It was the first vacation day I've taken from work in more than six months.  In short, a much needed weekend to just check out for a while.

We were holed up in a resort in Colorado Springs where we enjoyed mountain views, comfy beds, room service, moonlit swims, an all you can eat brunch worthy of heaven, baby shopping, movies, lots of desserts and an afternoon at the spa.  And most importantly, great conversations and the company of one another.

I did not want to come home.

I've been a bit tightly wound lately.  I've always leaned toward the anal retentive - very deadline driven.  I loathe a blown deadline - it makes me feel like a complete failure.  When I say something will be done - whether it's completing a project, marking off a giant to-do list in sharpie, or just running an errand - believe me, I'll do everything I can to make sure it's done on time and well.  With a massive deadline looming.  (Literally, the mother of all deadlines.)  I've been feeling somewhat...overwhelmed.  There are a lot of competing priorities in my life right now, and maintaining balance has been tricky.  Mostly because there are so many things out of my control.  And that always drives me crazy.  I don't always wait very patiently for others.  At work, I'm waiting for materials from my colleagues.  At home, I'm waiting for contractors (our bathroom remodel is a subject for another blog soon to come!).  And of course, I spend multiple moments every day tasting the anticipation of our daughter's arrival, which sends my head spinning into the multiple lists of "things to do before the baby is here."

Then, someone will tell me to relax.  Or chill.  Which, in my mind's eye, brings forth a vision of me throwing something at their head.  Because, to be totally honest, it's the structure and routine and gratification I feel by marking something off my list in sharpie that releases the relaxing compound in my brain.  Telling me to chill or relax does the exact opposite - it sends me over the edge reeling.

Which is why this weekend was so great.  I knew it was coming, so the structure to relax and play was already built into my head.  That was the to-do list for the weekend.  My friend is already well-aware of all of my neurosis, so I could just be myself and not worry about anything else.  So, for three days, I just let go of it all.  And it was good.

This weekend was a great reminder of how important it is for me to just take some time out for me.  To fall off the radar for a while.  And how that will become even more important over the coming years.  We've already penciled the dates for next year's get away.  I'm counting off days.  In black sharpie.

In the meantime, 10 weeks, 5 days and counting...

 

28 Weeks!

Oh, lordy.  My belly is getting heeuuge.  And things are becoming...awkward.  Some tasks that have defeated me this week are no great loss, i.e., unloading the dishwasher.  Others, like painting my own toenails, are everyday joys temporarily lost.  Sometimes I feel like internal organs are going to fall out of my rib cage when I bend over.  My balance is not so great and I have the beginnings of a pretty awesome waddle.  I also cannot see my own feet while standing.  What's worse is knowing that I'm only going to get bigger.  The thought of this almost horrifies me because seriously, I don't know how much more a person can really stretch. 

As if I wasn't feeling enough to begin with, the obvious expansion of my belly has beckoned a firestorm of inappropriate gestures and comments (mostly from strangers) lately.  I thought I'd share a few of my favorite choice selections...

10.  There's no need to include the fact that I'm pregnant when introducing me to someone - or publicly - because people can pretty much see that for themselves, and it's not your news to share.

9.  Do NOT touch my belly.  Especially if we've never met.

8.  Don't comment on my size.  In either direction.  Because, hello, if you were growing something inside of you, wouldn't you feel a little bit self-conscious about your appearance?

7.  I don't want to hear your labor horror stories.  I know you probably mean well and are trying to empathize with me, but please don't, because they scare the living shit out of me.

6.  I'm actually a bit surprised how many people have asked me how long my husband and I were "trying" to get pregnant.  This question is sometimes preceded with "did you plan it?"  Or my favorite, "Did you use fertility drugs?"  Umm...none of your damn business.  To all of the above.

5.  Recently at a party someone asked me how much weight I've gained and whether I was "on track" with my weight gain while I shoveled a second piece of cake into my mouth.  You wouldn't ever ask someone that if they weren't pregnant - why would you assume it's okay now?

4.  This one is great, too, "Are you planning to have more children?"  I don't know.  Can I meet this one first, please?

3.  There's no need to point out that you can see my belly button sticking out.  I'm well aware, thanks.

2.  Unsolicited advice on the delivery of my baby - particularly from strangers - really isn't necessary.  No offense to the check-out lady at the grocery store.  I'm glad the drugs worked for you, but get out of my experience.

1.  Please don't accuse me of being hormonal - even if you know (and I know) you're right.  Because those hormones will turn on you damn quick.  Just sayin'.

All this aside, I have to say that for the most part, people have been incredibly kind to me.  Chivalry is not necessarily dead based on the number of chairs that have been pulled out for me, or doors held, or beverages fetched.  It's much appreciated, and don't think I don't notice.

11 weeks, 5 days and counting...

Fall Fever

I go a little nutty for the fall, and this time of year the anticipation of cooler weather and soft sweaters is almost too much for my little heart to bear.  It starts with the slow trickle of fall fashion appearing in my favorite stores.  It's followed by the return of the yellow school bus to my neighborhood.  I smile as I see it being filled with cute, eager faces, ready to learn (ha! right?!).  But seriously - these little ones with the back-packs and brand new back to school outfits.  How I loved that.  I was totally that nerdy girl who looked forward to the first day of school.  Then, the weather starts to chill the eff out a bit - the air is crisper in the morning, the quality of the light begins to shift slowly to a more golden hue to match the leaves that are slowly changing.  And pumpkins.  Don't even get me started on pumpkins.  And apple cider.  And soft wraps and boot cut jeans.  And boots.  And the new fall television line-up, the new theatre season, the final harvest of the season. Ooooh.  Seriously.  I have a deep love affair for all things autumnal.

I guess it's because all good things always happen to me this time of year.  Serious major life changes.  I think it started with college - uprooting myself from rural Wyoming to Southern California in the fall of '97.  It was like reinventing myself.  Two years later, in early September, I boarded a plane to take me to England for a year with nothing more than a suitcase and a backpack.  I moved across the country from California to Washington, DC again in the fall of '01 to start my adult post-college life in the "big city" under the watchful eye of my big brother.  Two years later, I met my husband in November (the fall).  We married a year later in October (the fall).  We bought our adorable condo in Georgetown in the fall.  Then two years later, our town house in the Maryland 'burbs.  We made the biggest move of our lives across the country from DC to Denver in November (the fall).  Do you sense the trend?

And now, this fall - I'm having a baby.  We'll be celebrating our first Thanksgiving together with a new addition to our family at that all-American table.  Complete with mini pumpkins as decoration.

What a wonderful season it is indeed.

12 weeks, one day and counting....

27 Weeks!

We have ten weeks to go before the baby is full term, at which time she can make her debut at any time.

Shit.

That is all.

12 weeks, 6 days and counting...

Sweet

Got the lab results back from my anemia/glucose screen.  No anemia.  No diabetes.  So, I bought a pint of gelato to celebrate.

Brains

One perk to working on a university campus is the ability to take advantage of some of the great faculty/staff enrichment programs offered.  And they're free!  And you get to take a long lunch!  And learn stuff!  Win!

Today, I attended this great seminar on brain development of children.  It specifically focused on behavioral issues like those dreaded tantrums, and trying to reason with a kid throwing a fit, or why does my child hit me and say I'm a bad mommy, and just why is my six month old howling like a banshee for no reason at all.  The room was packed with early childhood ed teachers, parents, grandparents, and me.  The pregnant one.  But I was proud of myself for getting a head start, because, duh, my kid is still in utero, so we're not really having any arguments at the moment, which makes me feel like I have a real leg up on everyone else.  Because I'm competitive like that. 

But I had no idea that I would find the class so damn enlightening.  It was seriously like an hour and half of Oprah "Ah-ha" moments.  For example, the cognitive reasoning area of a child's brain doesn't begin developing until about age three and doesn't complete development until age six in some children.  So, putting a two year old in a "time out" as punishment does absolutely nothing for you.  Nothin'.  Zip.  The kid just doesn't have the brain power to understand.  That time out is more for the parent than the kid, really.  That's amazing to me.  Just that little nugget was worth it.


Essentially, there are four levels to our brain and its emotional response, and we start developing it from the bottom up and when we lose our cool - even as adults - we travel between all four levels of emotional response, usually from the top down.  From the highest level of cognitive reasoning, to primal brain-stem, "I'm going to physically crash out on the floor and howl because I have no other way to express myself" response.  And while adults can travel between brain levels quickly - within seconds - kids just can't navigate like we can.  Too many neurons firing and not enough roads built yet.  You can't get there from here.  It takes time to develop these areas of the brain, too.  Emotional response is pretty damn primal - at the brain-stem level - until about 9 months of age - when development of the next level begins.

All this probably sounds dreadfully boring, but seriously, I left feeling so enlightened.  And in some ways empowered.  I've often told friends that being pregnant feels a little like pledging a sorority.  You're not an official member of the parenting "club" yet, but they're going to share some secrets with you, and put you through some rituals, and eventually, there's this big rite of passage and you're a full on member.  This little seminar was like getting to hang out with a bunch of the older members and they decided to tell me a few nuggets of truth.  Which made me think - if just for a second - maybe I really can do this.

13 weeks, 3 days and counting...

26 Weeks!

And so we enter the third trimester.

Let the nesting begin.

I have now rearranged the furniture in the nursery at least five times.  With Scott volunteering to make the eight hour drive from Denver to Draper, Utah, to go to IKEA, I imagine I'll likely rearrange the furniture in there at least two or three more times when all is said and done (and that's probably a conservative estimate.)  I also bought diapers last week.  Yep.  Diapers.  Because along with nesting comes a certain amount of hoarding.  Which is why I also bought diaper rash creme, vaseline, baby laundry detergent, and an arsenal of earth/baby friendly cleaning products.

Baby Girl Weygandt, at this point, is pretty much just baking off.  She now has all five senses, which I think is just wild.  Her ears and inner ears are fully developed so she can officially eavesdrop on my conversations while maintaining a sense of balance.  She's still giving David Beckham a run for his money in my belly.  She's about 14 inches from head to toe, and, following the produce growth chart, is about the size of a large eggplant. 

Tomorrow, I have a doctor's appointment and we'll be doing some more blood-work including an anemia test and the glucose tolerance test, which is a screening test for gestational diabetes.  The timing is good, I suppose, because I have completed my mission to visit every ice cream parlor in Boulder, Colorado (where I work).  Instead of my regular lunch or coffee meetings, I've been pulling the pregnancy card every chance I get and scheduling ice cream meetings.  And it's been a good run.  Fingers crossed that the doc doesn't tell me to lay off the sugar tomorrow because, seriously, that's all I've got.  I can't indulge in an adult beverage (oh, what I would do for a margarita), I can't get a real caffeine fix, so delicious desserts - that's all I have left.  Please, oh please, don't take that away from me!  Because while I may have visited all the locations, there are so many flavors still to be savored.

13 weeks, 6 days and counting...

Simmer Down Now!

25.3 weeks pregnant

Someone slipped my baby steroids over the weekend. 

Those sweet little flutter kicks that felt like a goldfish are long gone.  The kid is now performing Jiu Jitsu on a regular basis. These kicks, head-butts and other gyrations are wicked strong.  You can see her move through my clothes.  It's weird.  It's distracting.  But I do kind of love it.  For the first time this weekend, she didn't shy away from Scott.  She gave him a big strong kick and he smiled a proud Daddy smile.

But seriously, kid.  Calm down a few minutes so I can enjoy lunch, okay?

14 weeks...4 days and counting...